Death Planning UK: The Complete Guide to Getting Organised
By Alex Johnson · Published 21 August 2026
What is death planning?
Death planning means organising your legal documents, your money and your wishes in advance, so that the people you love are not left guessing when you die. In England and Wales it covers three areas: the practical (a will, a letter of wishes, a record of your assets), the financial (protection, tax, pensions, funeral costs) and the emotional (funeral wishes, messages, reconciliations). Most of it can be done in a few evenings, and none of it requires you to be rich, old or ill.
When my father died suddenly in 2023, I found out very quickly which parts of this he had done and which he hadn't. The will was there. The instructions were there. A list of who to contact was there - as well as some kind words about how proud he was of me and my brother, in his handwriting, which I did not expect and have not forgotten. What wasn't there were the smaller practical things nobody thinks to write down. This guide is the expanded geography on my father's already excellent death planning map.
Why bother, when you'll be dead anyway?
Ha, don't be so cantankerous!
You will not experience the aftermath of your own death. Your family will. They will experience it while grieving, which is precisely the moment when nobody is at their best, and they will experience it under time pressure from banks, employers, landlords and HMRC, none of whom pause long for bereavement (especially HMRC!). Every hour you spend on this now is an hour they don't have to spend later, hunting for a policy number or arguing about whether you'd have wanted a burial.
There's also a selfish case, and I make no apology for it. Getting this sorted is one of the few genuinely effective treatments for low-level dread. The reason death planning feels frightening is that it's vague - and morbid. Once it becomes a list of tasks, some of them dull, it stops being frightening and starts being admin. the more you do, the more satisfying it is. You might actually really enjoy some of it. I did. Enough that I built a whole website!
The three pillars
I've split everything on this site into three areas. They're not equally urgent, and you don't have to do them in order, but between them they cover the ground.
Practical death planning: the paperwork
This is the foundation, and if you only do one section, do this one. It covers your will, your letter of wishes, a register of your financial assets, your digital estate, a list of contacts, guidance for your executor, a living will and a healthcare power of attorney. Together these documents answer the questions your family will actually be asking: what did they want, where is everything, and who do we call?
Most people already have a rough version of this in their head. Death planning is simply the act of getting it out of your head and onto paper, where it survives you.
Start with Practical Death Planning
Financial death planning: the money
This is the section that decides how much of what you've built actually reaches the people you meant it for. It covers inheritance tax and the reliefs that reduce it, life insurance and why writing it in trust matters, critical illness and income protection, your pension and the nomination form that governs it, investments, trusts, funeral costs, and succession if you own a business.
Some of it is about protecting your dependants after you die. A good deal of it, particularly income protection and powers of attorney, is also about protecting you while you're still very much alive. That to me feels like a real bonus.
Start with Financial Death Planning
Emotional death planning: everything else that matters
The paperwork keeps the estate moving. This section is about what your family will actually remember. It covers reflecting on your life and reconciling where you can, deciding what you want your funeral or memorial to be, capturing memories and leaving messages, organ donation, and, because a life is more than its ending, a bucket list worth the name.
None of it is legally required. All of it is optional. It is also, in my experience, the part people wish they had done, long after the estate has been settled and forgotten. I'm not only glad I did it, I actually really enjoyed writing and creating a lot of it!
Start with Emotional Death Planning
Where to actually start
If you want a single instruction: write a will, then tell someone where it is. That covers more ground than anything else you could do in an afternoon.
If you want the full picture, download my free Death Planning Master Checklist. It's a spreadsheet listing every task across all three pillars, split into essential and optional, with space to record your own details as you go. No email required, no sign-up, nothing to buy. Print it, work through it at whatever pace suits you, and keep it with your other documents so that whoever needs it can find it.
And if you've landed here because someone has already died, this isn't the page you need. Go to Dealing With Death instead, and I'm sorry for your loss.
Frequently asked questions
Is death planning the same as estate planning?
Not quite. Estate planning is mostly about your assets: who inherits what, and how much tax is paid on the way. Death planning includes all of that, but also covers the practical documents your family needs, your healthcare wishes while you're still alive, and the emotional side. Estate planning is a subset of death planning, not a synonym for it.
How long does death planning take?
The essential paperwork is a few evenings' work, not a project. A straightforward will, a letter of wishes and an asset register can realistically be done in a fortnight of occasional effort. The financial and emotional sections are better treated as ongoing, revisited when something significant changes.
Do I need a solicitor?
For a simple estate, often not. A DIY will is perfectly legal in England and Wales if it's correctly signed and witnessed. Use a solicitor when your situation has an edge to it: a second marriage, a business, property abroad, a vulnerable beneficiary, or anything you think might be contested. I'll tell you throughout this site where I think the money is worth spending.
I'm in my thirties. Is this too early?
No, and this is the most common mistake I see. Powers of attorney only work if you set them up before you lose capacity. Life insurance is cheapest when you're young and healthy. Guardianship for children only matters while they're young. Almost every part of death planning is easier, cheaper or only possible when done early.
Does any of this apply in Scotland or Northern Ireland?
The principles do, but some of the law differs, particularly around wills, intestacy and powers of attorney. This site works from England and Wales as the default and flags the significant differences where they arise, so Scottish and Northern Irish readers know when to seek local guidance.
What if I have almost nothing to leave?
Then this matters more, not less. Estates without a will are handled by intestacy rules regardless of size, and small estates are just as capable of causing arguments, delays and unnecessary costs. A will, a list of accounts and a note of your wishes take an afternoon and are worth having whatever your balance sheet looks like.
One last thought
Nobody plans their death because they want to think about dying. They do it because they've worked out that the alternative, leaving it to chance and to grieving people, is worse. Preparing for death really is no big deal. It's dying unprepared that costs your loved ones dearly.
“As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well spent brings happy death.”
Leonardo da Vinci
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About the founder. I'm Alex Johnson, and I built Not So Grave after my father died suddenly in 2023. Going through his estate taught me more about death planning than any guide I could find at the time, partly because of the documents he'd left, and partly because of the gaps where he hadn't. I'm not a solicitor or a financial adviser, and I'll always tell you when to use one. What I am is someone who's been through it and wants to make your turn easier.